Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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