Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
