can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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