is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
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He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
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I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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