apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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