Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
