why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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