And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
