does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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