Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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