Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
