I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
