"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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