totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle