ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Let's get the cat blown out
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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