Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
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FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
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currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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