but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize