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i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
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