so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
