I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Let's get the cat blown out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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