Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize