so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize
