Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
