i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
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