She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
