drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize