did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
