I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
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