you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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