i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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