4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Randomize
