if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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