the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
You're earring is so big in my mouth
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
