Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
she pinky promised me she was 18
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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