i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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