Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
i think my cat just said my name.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
