Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize