so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
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