Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Randomize
