hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
