I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
