carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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