your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
You are a genius and a whore.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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