There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
