She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
