you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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