Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize