he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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