hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
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