i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
