I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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